When I was younger, I was afraid of the dark. I often left my bedside lamp on at night. I eventually weaned myself down to a nightlight. And, to be honest, whenever I've moved into a new place (which has been a lot in my adult life), I need a light on somewhere to sleep well for the first few nights. This is probably why the bright parking lot lights that shine in my window don't really bother me.
Sometimes I wonder where our fears come from. Are they all learned? Or are some of them just innate?
I mean, I know I'm afraid of driving next to semi trucks because of all the horrible wrecks I've seen on TV and in my many years as a news reporter.
And I know I'm afraid of dolls that look like toddlers because I watched the movie "Child's Play" when was nine and I've been scarred ever since.
I don't know where the initial fear of the dark came from, but I suppose it's continued because I've seen too many episodes of "Criminal Minds" and "Law & Order: SVU."
I'm afraid when I'm gone for long periods of time that I will find my home has been broken into because that has happened to me before. In 2004, I returned to my apartment after a 14-hour workday, I found my door ajar and my place ransacked.
With the exception of that last one, all of my fears are based on something I've seen in entertainment. Perhaps I should stop watching some of those things.
Honestly, though, as I think about the above fears and other things that freak me out, I think it all comes down to one thing -- feeling out of control.
I can drive perfectly and I might still get in a wreck. I can lock all my doors each night and take security precautions, but if someone wants to get in, they'll get in.
Clearly, my fears are rooted in things I can't control, which is a lot of things. This explains a lot about who I am and some of the choices I've made in life.
What is your biggest fear?
This post is part of link-up with other bloggers in a Facebook group, which has been very supportive and inspiring when it comes to blogging. If you're interested in joining, click here and request to be added. In the meantime, check out some of the other posts:
Sarah Hartley
Gabrielle Bogan
Slice of Heaven
Chaotic and Collected
Sara Montana Says It's Me, Kelly
That is terrifying that your place was broken into! But I can definitely understand being afraid of things that you have no control over!
ReplyDeleteI would say that "not being in control" is probably my biggest fear. I have a huge fear of driving (so weird, i know!) and it's mostly because I don't feel as if I am in control. I could be the best driver in the whole world but that doesn't mean the people around me are, or that they are all paying attention, or that I won't hit ice! I also can't stand when people would try to hold me down to tickle me or something, I would completely freak out if I couldn't move or get up. I don't like that feeling. Also, I once had my apartment broken into too. It's such a terrible feeling
ReplyDeleteI think you nailed it - feeling the need to be in control and when you can't... it's so frustrating and terrifying. Also - being broken into? That was freak me out too! Forever!
ReplyDeleteYup, I think fear is ultimately about not being in control. We fear things because we can't determine the outcome.
ReplyDeleteI'm afraid of the dark, too. Because I've watched too many scary movies and bad things always seem to happen in the dark.
Love this! You totally hit the nail on the head.
ReplyDelete