Heartbreakers #3 & #4

Time to continue my series about the parade of heartbreakers in my life.  A few weeks ago, I told you about the first.  I'm going to skip the second, because he got plenty of blog space during my "Excerpts from My Teenage Diary" series.  I don't need to dwell on him any longer than I did (which was far, far too long), so let's move on to the third guy to attract my affections and then destroy them.

I had a few more crushes than just the two heartbreakers in high school (OK, more than a few), but the next dose of pain didn't come until college. I really didn't get over #2 until much later in life. I also hadn't managed to live it down, so I couldn't wait to get away from everyone in my high school. Thus, I chose a small private college for my post-secondary education. It was 2.5 hours from home and no one from my hometown had gone there in at least a decade. I'd visited and instantly fell in love with the beauty of the campus, the friendly nature of the staff and students I met and the journalism opportunities it promised. Additionally, I hoped it would offer a new crop of guys, and perhaps allow me to start over with a clean slate. I suppose it did both of those things, but my methods of crushing didn't really change. I was still really shy, yet told people who I was crushing on easily.

Early on, most of my crushes were just guys I saw around campus. First , there was the tall football player who sat next to me in communications class.  I moved onto a winter althlete with guy on the basketball team who occasionally wore his clothes inside out and made me blush when he teased me about knowing what "beso" meant during Spanish Class. I actually tried to talk to a runner with the most adorable baby face, but, ultimately, he probably still doesn't know who I am. Outside of the sports realm, there was also my partner in reporting class. Man, was he adorable. Not long ago, I received a press release from him, and it definitely brought back some memories.

But all of these were pretty superficial.  I adored them from afar, never really doing much about them. And then I discovered freshmen, I befriended them first and then tried to subtly make my feelings known. None of these ended well.

#3 had amazing eyes and a very sharp wit.  We would chat on MSN Messenger at all hours, sometimes about classes and sometimes just about random stuff.  I didn't really know how to flirt with him, but I tried.  I pretty much failed in person (some things never change), but I was a little better online.  At least I thought so.  During one bold chat session, I told him I had a little crush on him (as did just about every girl who knew him).  He said he was flattered, but at the time he just didn't really want to date anyone.  I accepted this response, but was devastated when he started dating another girl two days later.  He and I have remained friends, and my feelings for him became an inspiration of sorts later in my life.

#4 was a even more direct in his rejection than any of the previous guys. I met him via his roommate (one of my fleeting crushes), and again, we spent many hours chatting online. We would stay up until all hours of the morning, sharing music files back and forth.  One night, we were both at a party, and he came over to me and asked for a favor.  He said there was a girl there giving him unwanted attention and he wanted me to sit close to him and try and dissuade her.  Naturally, I agreed to it and sat next to him as he got drunk for the first time ever.  He was hilarious.  After the party, I volunteered to walk him home to try and keep him behaving.  This was not an easy task.  At one point, he wanted to do a cartwheel. Then, he wanted to climb a tree, and I literally had to talk him out of it. Our friendship went on, and he quickly figured out I liked him.  He said as much one night during a chat session.  I asked him what he thought of that.  He said, "I don't mind; I just want you to know it won't go anywhere. I'm looking for someone perfect, and you're not her."  Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.  Our friendship was never the same after that, although it did remain. By the way, he did go on to find that perfect woman and marry her.

 

College really wasn't any better to me in the love department than high school had been.  Stay tuned to see what the "real world" turned up.