That time I talked about my faith

Several weeks ago, during one of my many long drives, my mind was swirling with thoughts.  It bounced from work to friends to moving woes to random events.  A lot was going on with me at the time, and I was feeling pretty sorry for myself.

As I stopped at a red light, I took a deep breath and said out loud, "Why am I never enough for someone? Friends, guys, whatever ... why am I not enough?" 

The light turned green, and I proceeded through, but even in those few moments, I heard these clear words, "Just wait until you see what I have in store for you." 

They were in my head, but I knew where they had come from.

This was a God moment.  The first one I've ever had.

Now, that's not to say I haven't had lots of talks with God, but they were all fairly one-sided.  Mostly, they consisted of me talking, praying or just thinking.  I know better than to expect an immediate answer.  That's not how He works.  (Or so I thought.)  But sometimes it felt good just to put my thoughts, troubles and worries out there.

Some people reading this might be nodding.  Some might think I'm crazy.  And some might be surprised to learn I have a faith.

More than once in my life, my belief has been questioned out loud.  Actually, strike that.  More than once in my life, I've actually been called godless or told I'm not religious enough.

Here's my answer to that:
There's more than one way to be faithful.

Also, I don't like the word "religion."  At least not for myself.

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For some, their relationship with God calls them to weekly church services, sharing scripture and making sure the world knows what they believe. If that is what feels good to you, and helps you build and strengthen your faith, then by all means, carry on!

For me,  a relationship with God is a very personal one.  I don't attend church regularly. In my life, I have gone to a few different churches, and I've had good experiences and bad experiences.  I take in God's words and message in ways other than the bible, and I almost never talk about my faith.  Not because I'm ashamed, but because I just don't think it's anyone's business.

Ultimately, I do believe being a person of faith goes beyond church services and praying.  It's about how you treat and regard others -- your neighbors and your perceived enemies.  It's about caring for others -- even those you don't understand.   It's about believing in a higher power, but also having the wisdom to make your own decisions.  It's about trusting that there is a plan and being willing to pay attention to the little clues that lead you on your path.

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Maybe all of this sounds ridiculous to you.

Maybe this doesn't make me a Christian by your definition.

But I don't care.

I know what I believe, and I'm good with that.