Saturday, September 11, 2010

You are the only exception

And I've always lived like this
Keeping a comfortable distance
And up until now
I had sworn to myself that I'm content with loneliness

Cause none of it was ever worth the risk

Well, you are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception
You are the only exception

(Embedding of the video is disabled, but if you're interested enough, I know you'll click on over to see the music video for Paramore's "The Only Exception.")

Remember that blog entry I wrote about loving the single life and wanting to be single forever?  I'm still abiding by that statement, but I feel like I should mention there is one person who could change my mind with very little effort.  I call him my "exception." 

Everyone has one of these, right? 

The person for whom you would break all of your previously set standards and rules. 

Everything I've said I'd never do?  Yeah.  He could easily persuade me to eat those words.  I'd even break rules my parents have set for me.  If he knew he had this power over me, he'd either be terrified or flattered.  I haven't decided which.  I also haven't decided whether or not I should be terrified by this power.

The person who makes you think thoughts you've never entertained before.

I turn into a different person when I see him or talk about him.  Not in a bad way either.  I feel lit up from the inside, and I say a lot of things I wouldn't say otherwise.  Not to him, of course.  To the people around me.  My close friends.  I'm not going into more detail.  I don't know who reads this blog, but it IS public.



The person who has the ability to squeeze your heart without even trying to.

Goodness.  The effect this boy has on me is greater than I can describe.  I turn into an absolute puddle for him.  And trust me, he's not trying to have this effect on me.  He's taken.  Not married, but he might as well be.  And that's fine with me.  She seems like a very nice girl.  She'd be even nicer if she disappeared or managed to break up with him in amicable fashion (I don't want his heart mangled).  But I really am ok with him being taken.

In fact, maybe the appeal of this fantasy is in the fact that it can never materialize.  It's all good and fine for me to say he could change my mind about being single because I know he will never try.  So my singlehood, my rules and, ultimately, my heart are safe from being broken.  At least for now.  Like I said, he's the only one who could get through my defenses without much effort.  Anyone else will have to work really hard.  And so far, I haven't met anyone who likes me enough to put in that much effort.

P.S.  For those of you who know this person's identity, Imma need you to refrain from posting anything which might give it away.  Thanks and kisses.

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